The prefect of a department in France, who was a Christian man, often visited hospitals. Once, while visiting a hospital run by nuns, he was in the office of the mother superior when a young nun entered. Upon seeing the prefect, she began to withdraw. However, the prefect invited her to come in and asked her what her name was. “Sister Leocadia,” the nun replied.
“Which department do you work in?” he asked.
“In the ringworm unit,” the sister answered.
“Poor sister!” exclaimed the prefect. “Surely you take precautions to avoid becoming infected. Do you wear gloves?”
“No, sir, I use my bare hands, and after finishing the treatment, I wash them with plain water,” the sister replied.
“Poor sister! You will catch ringworm as well. Ask me for any favor, and I will grant it,” said the prefect.
The sister responded: “Well then, Sir, I am not happy, so you can do something for me. In the unit under my care, there are only twenty-five patients with ringworm, and I am strong enough to care for fifty… Can you send me more ringworm patients?”
The prefect was speechless. Later he said: “I offered a nun whatever she wished to ask of me — and she asked me for ringworm patients!”
While it is true that Jesus did not ask this nun whether she loved Him, or whether she loved Him more, or whether she wanted to love Him more, she took the prefect’s offer as if it were Jesus Himself asking about her love. If Jesus were to ask us if we love Him, I think we would all answer like Saint Peter: Yes, Lord, You know that I love You (Jn 21,15). That is why I am a Christian and follow you.
However, if Jesus were to ask us, “What favor do you ask of Me? What do you want Me to give you?” I think few Christians would answer like this nun, who in the end asked for something that would enable her to love Jesus more. To ask ourselves that question is a good exercise to see how much we love Jesus.
Many times, we focus more on all the goods we receive from God for loving Him. Certainly, God showers those who love Him with blessings and graces; in fact, as Saint Paul says, He makes all things work for the good of those who love Him (cf. Rom 8:28). However, we often forget the other side of love: love is more about self-giving than about receiving. Receiving is actually a response to the self-giving.
This is the logic of love that we find so difficult to understand — the logic that causes so many relationships that should be based on love to fail, because they are based not on love but on selfishness. So, what is this logic? That in order to receive, one must first give oneself. Whoever does not give himself sincerely and selflessly is not disposed to receive; and, in fact, he places barriers to receiving, because deep down, selfishness still reigns in his heart, and he gives only in order to receive.
